So, off we go to Osceola for the weekend. Everyone is there, and it's a great time just like normal. Saturday morning- opening morning. We had finally gotten all the boys down the night before- those 6 had the WORST cases of buck fever EVER! They could not sleep- it was funny:) Hubs had told Joe to be ready by 5:30- they were going to head out early and be in the woods at first light. Well, our alarm went off, and Hubs figured since they hadn't gone to bed till late, and they're not exactly early risers, he'd let them sleep a few more minutes. About 15 minutes later he got up, got all dressed, and went upstairs to get some coffee. He gets in there to find Joe standing there, in the dark, leaned against the wall, boots, coat, rifle, READY. Hubs looks at him, nods- morning Joe, why didn't you make the coffee?
Joe: you didn't say to. You said to be up and ready at 5:30, and that's all you said for me to do, so that's what I did.
Hubs: yeah....ok Joe. Well, next time....coffee. Ok?
Joe: yes sir.
Hubs went down and woke the other two monster buck hunters, and they got ready and got their hot chocolate, and off they went. I stayed in with the wee ones; it was a bit cold out that year to take them out so early. It wasn't long and I heard bang! Bang! Bang! ok...I figured they'd head back soon and hang their deer. Nope....they were gone, and gone, and gone....I finally gave up waiting and went back to bed.
They eventually came back, two deer in tow. Hubs was laughing so hard- see, Joe had never gutted a deer before. This was his learning experience. And boy did he learn a lesson...
Joe sat on his little stool Hubs had left for him, waiting for his deer. Pretty soon it came along, and Joe took his shot. He said "it jumped up and turned around and ran- I thought I missed it! So there I am, silently throwing a fit and banging my fist on my knee, by myself in the woods." Hubs shot his not long after, and decided he'd better go check on Joe. He gets over there, and Joe's still sitting on the stool.
Hubs: well, I heard you shoot, where's your deer?
Joe: I think I hit it...it ran off.
Hubs: huh. Well, you sure you hit it?
Joe: oh yeah, I hit it.
Hubs: well, get up. Let's track it.
Joe: ok...
Hubs: (after walking about 50 feet) Hey Joe, is this your deer? This dead one laying here bleeding all over?
Joe: yep, thats the one.
Hubs: you shot it in the heart with a 30.30 Joe. It wasn't about to run far. How come you didn't get up and look for it?
Joe: you told me to stay here until you came back.
Hubs: right.....
Hubs: ok, well lets get this thing gutted, I've got one laying I need to do too.
Joe: ok....well where do I start?
Hubs: (points) well, you can start at either end, really, but once you get down to this end here...well, you've got you a little buck, so you've got, um, "equipment" to deal with too.
Joe: Oh. I see that. Well- here goes.....(he starts in on it)
things were going pretty well until he got to that "one end"
Joe: now what?
Hubs: well, you'll have to get that out of the way; cut around it, and then you gotta, um, cut the butthole out- otherwise if you cut into it, all that stuff in the intestines will come out...and then you've got a real mess. It's best to keep all that on the inside.
He gets around all that, and then...the butt.
Joe: so, whats the best way to do this?
Hubs: (and here's the lesson) well, some people stick their finger in there and just cut around that, and then pull it all out.
Joe: really?
Hubs: yep.
Joe: ok....He extends his pointer finger....moving ever so slowly closer to the deer...and stopped about 1/4" from that poor deer's behind- and he looked up at Hubs and said "is this how you do it?
Hubs: (unable to keep from laughing any more) no, Joe.....don't stick your finger in there.
What's the lesson?
First one up makes the coffee.
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